Chapter One

The sun was rising over Jungle Hall, MD (Perry Hall, MD on Jungle Earth,) and, even though I was very stinky just like my son, Lion Heart Smart Heart Hartlion, I had to live with it {our bath day is July Forth, just like every male Jungle Human on Jungle Earth} like I have for thirteen years now, so starts another day on Jungle Earth with me being very stinky. My son, who smelled as worse as I did, came up to me. "Dad, can I go play stink tag with the other man cubs?" said Lion Heart Smart Heart Hartlion. Stink tag is a type of Jungle Earth tag game that man cubs play that sometimes passes the stinky smell of people who have not bathed in months onto other man cubs. "I don't know, son, some of those older man cubs do play kind of rough, and sometimes you come home smelling like them, but if you really want to, go ahead." I said.  We then went out and played, coming in only for lunch covered in mud (Jungle Hall can get very muddy during the rainy season) and filth, just like male Jungle Humans like to be.  After lunch, Miss Hartlion, my wife, who knew our son and I could not wash the mud off of us until July Forth, told us to go outside and get even more dirty with mud and filth.

Introduction

My name is Patrick Michael Hartnett, well that was my name, up until December 22, 2012, when the world became one big jungle with only the people born after 1980 surviving and everyone else being turned into jungle animals, but if the person was very old (like over 80  years old,) they died.  Anyways, my name nowadays, the year 2025, is Paw Mitch Hartlion and I am one of the two anglophilic Jungle Humans, what humans are called nowadays, in my human pride, what families are called nowadays.  I have a man cub, what boy and guys are called nowadays, of my very own named Lion Heart Smart Heart Hartlion.  These are my stories of my life on Earth, now called Jungle Earth, of my jungle life.